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Letter to Mom from Left Coast
To MOM in Seattle, Washington
From your daughter Jennifer in Los Angeles
Dear Mom:
As I watch the inaugural, I am still crushed that Al Gore did not get in office. Look at that jerk with the cowboy hat on!! What a disgrace! And look how immoral he is getting a ticket for drunken driving 24 years ago!
And aren't you so excited? Jesse Jackson has a new child! I sent him $5. I used to send him $50, but my electric bill was $2,345 last month, and I was short of cash. That is not bad, though...Susan's bill was $3000 because she has a TWO-bedroom apartment.
I am hoping to meet Jesse's new girl friend out here.
I think she is living with his other girl friend from 1996. (Or maybe it was the 1994 one I forgot.) I love California. Everything is so "environmentally correct" here.
And all our liberal friends are in power now. I am sure glad we demonstrated against building all those power plants 8 years ago or else this state would be polluted like Texas and Florida.
My friends and I are going out tomorrow to demonstrate against that nuclear power plant they recently re-opened. We shut that down in 1994, and I think some Republican assholes are re-opening it. Probably just to keep the businesses going. GEEZ! The love child is really doing ok. She just doesn't understand the blackouts. I wish her father would visit, but I am not sure who it is. I may tell George that it is his, cause he brings me the most crack and ecstasy. Well, don't call me on Mondays, Wednesdays, or Fridays because those are the designated days with no electricity. Not on Tuesdays or Thursday either cause those are the designated days with no water or phones.
Call me on Saturday between 3 and 4 p.m. usually we have power then. I don't understand why states with lots of power like Texas and Florida don't try to help us out.
We won't have to worry much longer about pollution because all the businesses are shutting down, and there is no jet fuel for the airlines. And gas is $8.50 a gallon... so no one can afford to drive.
I LOVE California!
Thank God for the Democrats!
Love, your daughter Jennifer
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